Yesterday was a really, really hard day. Carson spent a lot of time in time out and I spent a lot of time praying I was being a good mommy. By the end of the day, as Justin was walking out the door with Jonah to go watch his buddy's baseball game, I felt like begging him to take Carson with him too.
Then, I took a deep breath. I had a choice in how I wanted the day to end. And I decided I wanted it to end well.
I had already promised Carson we would play with his construction set while Justin and Jonah were at the game. Playing construction is one of the things Carson and I used to enjoy when Jonah was at preschool and we would have three hours of uninterrupted time to hang out. I recognize that Carson misses that one on one time with me, and I was looking forward to catching up with him.
The hour that followed our difficult day, our frustrating homework time, and our painfully long dinner, was one of the sweetest we have had in a long time. Just the act of pulling out the construction pieces and Lego boxes filled me with nostalgia. I remembered the times we enjoyed together when Carson was little, and I enjoyed him so much. We built and played for an hour, and I didn't even realize the time had passed.
At one point, I looked up at Carson and said, "I love you." Carson said, "I love you more. And I'm sorry I was bad today."
My eyes filled with tears. I reminded Carson that he was not a bad boy, but that he had made some poor choices that day. I asked him why, and he did not have an answer for me. But that was ok. The heartfelt "sorry" and "I love you," were all I needed.
I thought back to a book I have learned so much from, and have read and reread chapters from--Wild Things, the Art of Nurturing Boys, by Stephen James and David Thomas. In it, the authors tell parents that often the way to get your boy to talk to you is to do something together that you both enjoy.
Jonah doesn't want to come home from school and sit at the kitchen table with me and tell me about his day. But when we go outside to throw the baseball, he's suddenly telling me about reading groups, who he played football with on the playground, and how he enjoyed the special treat I put in his lunchbox. Playing catch is invaluable time spent with my little boy, and time I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.
It is hard sometimes to make the time to PLAY. There will always be laundry, and phone calls, and dinner prep, and going through the endless stacks of papers. But in the end, finding the time to play with our kids is priceless, and has a big reward. When we make the time to play with them, they tell us things. They open up their little hearts and let us in. That to me, is one of the best parts of being a parent.
Friday, November 2, 2012
Our week in iphone pics...
|It's NOVEMBER!!! That means I had to write December on my white board calendar (I keep two months going at a time in an effort to stay organized)!!! So hard to believe we're here already.|
|This little guy jumped in my cart at Marshall's when I was supposed to be shopping for athletic pants (guess who doesn't want to wear jeans this fall?). He was so cute and so cheap ($4.99) I couldn't pass him up. Now, what to do with him?|
|Halloween dinner and a story. Mummy dogs and a great book! The weird black looking stuff is barbecue sauce Justin put on his plate before I had a chance to snap the pic. :)|
|Career Day at Stallings. Baseball player and Rock Star.|
|Practicing for the spiders we would later make at Carson's fall party. Ritz crackers with peanut butter, raisins for eyes, and licorice for legs.|
|Breakfast for dinner--a Sunday night tradition. Here's my Mickey Mouse shaped egg yolk. Wish I could say I had a hand in making it this way, but that is just how the egg yolk formed.|
|Halloween Fun Run at Stallings Elementary.|
|Carson came in third place for Kindergarten. He was SO proud!|
How was your week?